I had just finished my secondary school that is 10th here in India. I had given my S.S.C board (Secondary School Examination) and also I was actively involved with church. I had been an animator in my parish since my 8th standard. Being actively involved in the church and making props and daliy zonal activities was all a normal thing for me.

The time was our church feast for which me and my fellow animator for the zone worked round the clock for the preparation of props, that we would have used to participate in our zonal parade at the opening of our church feast.

Our church feast is celebrated on a large scale, our church was founded in the year 1606, and the year this incident of which I’m writing is about 2006 catch roughly, I think it was our 400th anniversary of our parish.

So being an auspicious day we all had prepared for this day well in advance. But for me the surprise was yet to unfold. The feast day had arrived and we were all ready with our props. The day started with attending the feast mass. After the mass we wished everyone and we all animators got together there by discussing about the evening event for which we all had prepared so much.

Finally the moment had come, we had a great parade with our prop, mascot and along with all the zonal members and zonal families. Our parish is very huge and on the feast day there was almost over 1000’s of people attendance.

So done with the parade followed by all the performances scheduled on that day and in the was an event for Mr and Mrs where each contestant taking part was suppose to be on the stage, in front of 1000’s of people and this particular event was judged by judges well all the event on that day was judged by judges but this particular had and questions and answers where involving crowd was involved.

Now the surprise, I was told by my head animator that she had given my name for this particular event and it was without my consent. I was not aware and not prepared for this. “Keep yourself in my shoes and think what would you have done someone telling you to do something that you are not aware of or not prepared.”

To start with I’m very shy person, not a public speaker never have been till now. So getting to know that I will have to compete in front of such huge crowd I was taken back and was not ready for that. Next what happened as what I decided to do I’ll remember till I die.

You call me a “coward” or “nervous”. Without letting anyone know or consulting anyone, I decided not to take part in that event though I was involved with rest of it, but I didn’t go on the stage. They kept announcing my name on the mike but I didn’t go. The person who was announcing my name even went ahead and said some funny remark, for me not going ahead, to which I gave a deaf ear and didn’t go atall.

To this day I regret on my decision and always think on What if I had gone on that stage? What if I had overcome my fears? What if…

It has taken, lot of courage to write this event from my life, which if I had gone ahead on the stage, the story of my life would have been different. Even now when I close my eyes I get the feeling like that stage is calling me.

Someone has said a very nice like “Today only happens once in a lifetime.”